I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
