i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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