He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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