Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
