If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize
