There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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