I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
