Already got asked if we're dating
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize