She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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