I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
