K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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