I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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