when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
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