I think im going to throw up on grandma
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
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