wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
