tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
