New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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