did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
