Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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