you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
