She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
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