GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize