I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
