so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I need water and some morals
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize