I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
How's work?
Spinning.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
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