I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
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