You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Randomize
