He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
