I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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