Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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