ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
