why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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