capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
