I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize
