is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
