There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
