Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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