Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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