I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
