Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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