you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Randomize
