That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Randomize
