My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
