I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
