my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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