wanna go halves on a baby?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
We left an ass print on the piano.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
