Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Did you pee in the oven last night??
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
