If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
it glows. i had to have it.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize