either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
