in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
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